Not mySelf; 18 Jul 19
Every day I fight the fear of failure. It’s not that I am scared of the rejection from galleries, shows, etc. (although it does hurt). It’s more that I am scared I will fail my parents, kids and husband, even my peers and friends. But if I give up and quit, then I really am failing them. So I take the rejections with as much grace as I can muster. I feel the pain of them, because if I didn’t then it wasn’t worth the risk to begin with. And then I have a glass of wine, maybe do a workout, and continue to push forward. I work on building my tribe. The tattoo artist who creates jewelry, the body piercer with a heart so similar to mine that I swear we must have been cut from the same cloth. The photographer friends who’ve celebrated with me as well as encouraged me through the harder times. My wingmen and sisters who’ve inspired me to continue to push myself. And with every failure I come back. I rise from the ashes and learn whatever I can from it. I choose to be a Phoenix.